For a long time now, probably since the beginning of this war, I've felt shame. The big machine seems overwhelming and I’ve felt so little at times. I have daydreamed about moving to another country. I've felt an uncomfortable pull during The Pledge of Allegiance at my daughter‘s school, and during the Star Spangled Banner before an event. Does singing along imply I support the policies of the current administration?
But I do love my country, so I place my hand over my heart and instead of singing, I've prayed.
I’ve sent apologies to a young blogger who had to flee Baghdad, reminding her that not all Americans support the war, and that the last presidential election was very close. I told her we are so sorry for what has happened to her home, her beloved cats, her life.
Yesterday, I took Riley to vote with me. Hand in hand on the way there, we talked about how my great grandmother, (grandma Wilson's mommy) could not vote because they didn’t think women were as smart as men. I told her that many brave women worked very hard to make sure little girls would be able to vote when they grew up. At the booth, we pulled a chair over for Riley to stand on so she could see me enter my choices. I saw the spark in her eye. She will remember.
When I went to bed last night, it looked like the Republicans had Virginia. This morning, the Democrats had rallied. A recount. Who knows when we’ll know for sure who won?
But look at the rest of the country!
I don’t think I’ve ever felt prouder to be an American.